Ritual Forgiveness

For years afterward I ritually forgave you
by email during the High Holy Days
not that you're even Jewish
or asked me to.

It wasn't until this "me too" epidemic
that we actually talked about it
on the phone.

I was surprised how hard that was
for both of us.

I'm not angry anymore
but felt fearful, charged.

So maybe I don't really forgive you
because if I did
why was it so hard?